By Way of Beauty: Part 1
This is the first of a three part series written by Catholic Wife and Mother, Stephanie Li.
Let me begin with a story. At the beginning of October in 2021, my husband and I with our three young children, the youngest being born less than two months earlier, decided to rush down from Ontario, Canada in a 35 foot motorhome to Houston, Tx.
My closest aunt was dying from stage four pancreatic cancer; she had just a few days left and we had hoped to see her before her passing. The trip was long and arduous. Under normal driving circumstance, the trip would take approximately 24 hours. However driving in a 35 foot motorhome, the trip took us 8 days.
There we were, from morning to night, strapped in tight, my husband at wheel, bouncing along the highways between Ontario and Texas, going as fast as we possibly could - a staggering 70mph! My heart had never felt so heavy. My emotions had never before been so taxed.
Weeks later after the ordeal of travelling to Texas, being present to family and attending my aunt’s funeral, my husband and I found ourselves in desperate need for a place to pause and process, to rest and recuperate. We set our sights on Alabama and decided to park at a very small campground on a tiny island off of the coast.
What we found there was not what I had expected. Beauty. I can not dive into the full depths here and now of the beautiful experience we had there. But one memory in particular I will share. It is of my husband leading our four year old, two year old and myself with newborn in tow to the beach, a mere 100 yard walk from the door of our camper to the shore of the Gulf. The most beautiful walk I have ever experienced.
Tall and fragrant pine trees thickly lined the warm sandy path. Blue jays cried high above, with various smaller birds chirping closer by. The vibration of wings was everywhere. A warm breeze met us in every step, bringing with it the salty fragrance of the water. My children were giggling here and there, stopping every other step to ponder in wonder at this sight or that.
I thought to myself there and then: “I want this! This is how I want my children to grow up. With beauty immersion!” A line from a favorite song from our wedding came to mind: “The wilderness will lead you to your heart where I will speak” (the Song of Hosea).
And then reality set in. How am I going to recreate this back at home? How…on the seventh floor of our condo that overlooks the traffic, buildings, and on the horizon the city of Toronto. I want birds and breeze and blooming flowers (a beautiful yellow sand flower was in bloom at the time of our walk to the beach in Alabama). All we have at home are the endless noises of traffic and construction from the floor above us.
I want to smell the salt and feel the breeze, not the stale air of the city with the subtle hints of marijuana being smoked somewhere illegally outside or the feeling of fear that my children will be exposed to something crude or even worse, miss out on so much beauty altogether.
From that moment onward, I made it a mission to get our family out of the city and somewhere viscerally more beautiful and enriching. My husband was on board, check! Miles and miles we searched in our 35 foot motorhome to find the place where we could plant our roots and put our feet in the dirt. But after miles and months of searching, what I found was the realization that I was not on board with what God was intending or inviting me to in that present moment, in that present season of life.
What He had been inviting me to was a mindset shift. Many months of learning many new mindset skills were to follow. And one day, a beautiful and Spirit inspired realization: In terms of being immersed in beauty, it is not so much where we are living but rather how we are living, and rather how I am thinking.
I learned how to ask myself better questions, like “How can I cultivate beauty in my life and in the lives of my husband and children more fully? How can I intentionally cultivate the love and desire for beauty in our lives, in our home?” No matter where we are living, be it in a condo or in a cottage, in a city or in the country, immersion of beauty is possible! Let me show you how.
———
Stephanie Li is a wife, stay-at-home mama, homeschooler, and beauty enthusiat en route to becoming a Certified Catholic Mindset Coach, with a passion to help women craft their ideal conditions.
